just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
