you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
