Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
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Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize