Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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