just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Never underestimate the power of titties
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