We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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