No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Randomize
