The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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