We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
So much rum. So many feels.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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