NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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