My first STD was from a foam party
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm like, not good at living.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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