What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
