I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize