you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
