I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
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