tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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