I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize