so explain again why im purple
no
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize