respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize