Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
