you guys were way drunker than both of me
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Come share oat with me in your robe
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
