Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize