sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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