So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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