It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize