You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
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