Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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