there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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