he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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