so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
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He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
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I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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