She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize