my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
