I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
