Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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