what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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