Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
sex in a hospital.. check
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
