found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
The Olympian is in my bed
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