Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
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