he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
