I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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