nut hugger
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
