hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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