I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
