Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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