Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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