i need an iv and a liver transplant
Green mimosas i think yes
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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