Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
