There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
this just has baby written all over it
you didnt know i had herpes?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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