so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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