i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
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